The following are common uses for midgets. Don’t worry about paying them, they work for Rice Krispies. Also, never play hide ‘n seek with them. You’ll never win.
Use them for:
Reenactments
Remember that show on Nickelodeon “The Adventures of David the Gnome?” Well, all you need is a fox and you can live through every episode like when you were 10.
Mechanics
When your check engine light comes on, pop the hood and drop a couple in. That shit is probably like Disneyland to them.
In the bedroom
Hate performing oral on your wife? Tag in your tiny friend while you enjoy Girls Gone Wild infomercials.
Squeezing into Tight Places
Lose you wedding ring down the garbage disposal? Use your midget’s disgustingly small hands to dig in. Turn on the disposal for fun, i’m pretty sure they’re arms grow back anyways.
Use them as Coupons
I dare you to walk into a Jack in the Box with a midget and NOT get a free order of Mini Sirloin Burgers. I bet they’d thrown in the fries and a drink if he can sing.
Your welcome. Also, feel free to add your own uses below.
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Back Scratcher? Back Scratcher!
I agree whole-heartily with these uses!!!
giant Chess/Foosball
Instead of going to the gym, find a metal bar and tell them to hold on, its a good work out
hey did you toilet get stuck,
tag your lil, pal in he can fix it no need to pay 2000 for a plumber.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k_CAs3q7G48&feature=related
so true
Hahaha, brilliant!
- Nick R.
These were actually pretty gay. A 2 year old could have put this together. If your going to try and be funny, why dont you actually put some work into it? Maybe next time it will actually be funny, douche bags